


4 Missed Calls 5 Unread messages

by thatdrumblonde



Series: tumblr prompts [4]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, M/M, alcohol use, i write hanzo crying too much its almost ooc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-09-12 16:39:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9080761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatdrumblonde/pseuds/thatdrumblonde
Summary: Hanzo, reminded of and blinded by his self-hatred, pushes Jesse away.--tumblr prompt: "okay but mchanzos first real big fight. go wild." i went wild. angst ensues.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for opening this work!! ily!!!! i hope you're ready for some sad hanzo shimada ???

“Darling,” McCree drawled, teasing hands lacing Hanzo’s waist. “Come in my quarters. Wanna treat you.”

He giggled due to the teeth on his earlobe. “I can’t Jesse. I have a meeting. You know this.”

“After,” he swayed. “Been thinkin’ about you all day.”

“Yes. After.”

\--

Hanzo stepped out, sliding the tablet back to Winston. The archer stopped Zenyatta before he could escape. “Where was Genji?”

“He could not attend,” he answered simply.

“He was supposed to be here,” said Hanzo coldly. “Do not keep secrets from me.”

“If you must know,” the omnic hummed, “your brother had an emergency appointment with Dr. Ziegler.”

“What? Why?” he snapped. 

“His armor needed repairing,” he shrugged, floating away.

.

They had left the door cracked open. Hanzo heard his brother’s suit hiss, then the doctor’s voice. “This will only take a second. I need you to breathe.”

A cry of pain. 

“Genji, be still. You will feel relief in a moment.”

Genji groaned. “I -- _shit._ I know. I--”

“Genji. Genji? _Breathe!”_

Hanzo’s hand hovered over the door handle.

“Genji, you need to--”

“‘S-- hard to--”

“I’m changing the levels. Stay with me.”

A gasp, an exhale.

“That’s it. How is it now?”

“Breathing is easier,” Genji admitted. “Thank you.”

Angela’s heels clicked across tile. “I knew that brother of yours soiled the ease of oxygen flow, but I must have missed something.” Hanzo flinched.

“No. It was fine for ages. This is only recent.”

“When Hanzo scarred the tissue… I don’t understand how you forgive someone after this amount of damage.”

“He is my brother, Dr. Ziegler. There is still good in him.”

“Yes, well. I have to believe that. After all, he and Jesse are so close. I have known McCree for quite some time; he is like a brother to Fareeha. He has come so far. I couldn’t stand the thought of your- your brother breaking his heart.”

“I knew McCree. He is a good man, and he trusts Hanzo. As do I.”

“At what cost, Genji?”

“We let him into Overwatch, Doctor. If we cannot show him trust--”

A clipboard slammed the counter. “Forgive me if I cannot see the world in such a light as you do, but you did not slave over your mutated body, cheating death trying to piece you together! Family ties or not, I cannot find trust in someone who murders someone who trusted them!”

Genji snapped. “You were not there, Dr. Ziegler.”

“Does it matter? He killed you for power!”

Hanzo, able to hear no more, sauntered down the hall, shaking.

\--

4 missed calls. 5 unread messages. 

Texts 1 through 4. McCree. 

10:38 PM. [Where r u?]

11:13 PM. [Sugarrrrrrrrrr]

11:54 PM. [it’s ok if you wanna sleep or something just let me know]

10:41 AM. [hey baby please answer did i do something wrong just tell me]

Another swig of sake.

Fifth text. Genji. [ur bf is moping what did u do]

One voicemail.

[“Hey, darlin’. It’s Jesse. It’s alright if you don’t wanna come by tonight, but if you could let me know you ain’t hurt or nothing… Just call me back, alright?”]

Hanzo locked his phone, tossing it back on the table.

\--

5:36 PM. Hanzo made his decision.

McCree was shooting in one of the practice ranges. The archer entered his code, then slipped in. Stealth wasn’t an option, as the door made several noises as it opened. 

“Hanz!” McCree blinked, swiftly shutting the simulation down and going to his lover’s side. He hesitated before he took Hanzo’s hands loosely in his. He didn’t retaliate, but refused to meet his gaze. “I was worried as hell. Why didn’t you answer my messages?” He paused. “Angel, what’s wrong? Your eyes-- have you been crying?”

“I needed time to think. About this,” Hanzo mumbled. “And how it cannot continue.”

“What?” McCree breathed, and Hanzo’s face fell even further. “Hanzo, if I did something wrong, you gotta tell me. I’ll make it right.”

“It was nothing you did,” Hanzo assured.

“Then why?”

“You just have to… go with it. We cannot be together anymore.”

“No,” Jesse snapped. “That ain’t good enough. I need a reason. A reason to throw away everything I feel for you like trash. Now I ain’t gonna tie you down, but we have something. Why did it fly away so suddenly?”

“I am not the man you are meant to be with,” Hanzo shook. “It is best we end this now before I break your heart.”

“You’re doin’ it now!” he growled. “You are making the choice to break my heart. This is coming from nowhere!”

He clamped his eyes shut. “You will realize this is the best course of action in time.”

“You still haven’t explained yourself,” McCree droned. “Just tell me. If it was nothing I did, what? You suddenly realized you don’t like me? Or you never felt anything?”

“No!” Hanzo gasped, ripping his hands away as if the gunslinger’s hands were fire. He turned his back to McCree, shrinking. “I feel… I have never felt anything like when I’m with you. But my desires are ultimately selfish. You deserve so much more than what I am. I can never be that man.”

“Bullshit.”

Hanzo flinched. “I speak the truth.”

“Stop, Hanzo. You know there ain’t nothing in this world I want more than you.”

An uncomfortable silence. 

_“Why,_ Jesse.” Hanzo balled his hands into fists. “You could have anyone. You choose a killer. The cold-hearted. I don't even have the Shimada clan anymore.” 

“I'm not exactly sparkling myself. I should be the one asking that question.” 

A glance. “Do not question your worth.”

“Then why are you questioning yours?”

“I am irredeemable. My brother suffers because I betrayed him. How long will it take before I hurt you?”

“You won’t,” he insisted. “You ain't that person anymore.”

“You do not know that.” 

“You stopped being the man who killed your brother the moment you left the Shimada clan. You didn't know any better, and you regret what you did.” 

“I _should_ have known better, Jesse,” Hanzo breathed. “Even then I should have put Genji before the clan. But I wanted to please my father. My father who wanted his eldest to kill his youngest son.”

“If you were still that man, you wouldn’t be sittin’ here upset over what you’ve done,” hushed McCree. “Bad guys don’t worry ‘bout being good.”

“That is not how redemption _works,_ Jesse!” he barked, finally facing him. 

The gunslinger huffed. “There ain’t nothing I can say to convince you, then? ‘Cause I love you, Hanz. And if you can’t see --”

“That is my point! I do not deserve what is given to me. I do not deserve Genji’s forgiveness; I do not deserve your love!”

“Do I need to repeat myself?” McCree growled. “I love you. We can talk about who deserves who another time. You’re not gonna change how I feel.”

“Jesse,” Hanzo croaked. 

“I’ll say it as many times as it takes,” he told. “Genji doesn’t resent you. I know you did what you thought you had to. But you left and changed. Genji knows. I know. The whole goddamn team knows. And if they don’t, I’ll make sure that changes. Because if they can accept my shitty past, they better damn well accept yours. I’ve never felt this way about anyone, Hanzo. You gotta believe your worth.”

Then the Shimada sobbed. “I love you,” was all Hanzo said before another sob escaped.

“Hanzo-”

“I never wanted to leave you. I just thought-- it would be safer if you-- how can I trust myself, Jesse?” he wept. “The thought of breaking your heart, I--”

“Hanzo, baby. Come ‘ere.”

The archer slammed into his lover, burying his face in the scent of his serape with a choir of apologies. “I have done… nothing to deserve- to deserve you, but I am forever grateful. To have you.”

“‘S not true,” he hushed, rubbing circles into the archer’s back. “You do deserve me. You deserve the world, ‘n I’m gonna spend every breath trying to give it to you.” 

“I do not want the world. I yearn only for you.”

“Then let’s not do this again,” McCree whispered. “I love you. That’s all that matters, angel. Don’t think about what could go wrong.”

“I am sorry.”

“I forgive you, baby. Just promise to talk to me next time.”

“I promise.”


End file.
